How to Have Better Conversations

There are two things that I feel are very important if you want to have better conversations. You need to be curious and you need to ask the right questions. 

Being curious for me means having a desire to learn, and having a real interest in the other person.

A great way to show you’re interested is by asking good questions. But what does that mean?

Instead of asking closed-ended questions that can be answered by a simple “yes” or “no”, ask open-ended questions that require more than a simple one-word answer, and that encourage the person you’re speaking with to open up.

Open-ended questions are:

  • How?
  • Who?
  • What?
  • When?
  • Where?
  • Which?
  • Why?

And then, if you make sure that those open-ended questions are pleasure-producing, you’ll make the other person feel good and the conversation more memorable.

So instead of asking the obligatory “How are you?”, you might like to try something like, “What was the most interesting thing that happened to you today?

The response might well open the door to a much more meaningful conversation. 

What other open-ended, pleasure-producing questions we could ask?


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